Father Stefan reflects on community and the catch 22

I would like to share with you what the Lord gave me in prayer today about community. I was praying about this catch 22. We are all told that we have emotional needs. I never understood how we were to have these needs meet. I was continually told by my spiritual director that it is no one responsibility to meet my emotional needs. More than this he has told me on many accounts as a priest you are never to look to another to fulfill an emotional need. 

In prayer, I sense that the Lord gave me the answer. When we use the language of emotional needs our needs tend to get larger and larger. When we start with having an emotional need meet than we are beginning with what we lack.

However, scripture says, “You are already blessed with every gift.” Jesus says, “There is nothing you lack.” It hit me when we begin with realizing that our every need has already been fulfilled than we are starting with an fullness. When we realize that we already have every need fulfilled than we can truly love.

Than it hit me in prayer that the way to community is by not seeking community but by learning how to be alone. When we learn how to be alone than community will flow from that. Sometimes the answer is the opposite of what we think. 

This is not all that odd. There is a question that couples who are getting married are asked. The question is, will you only be happy if you are married? It is only the person that can be happy being alone that will be able to fully enter into marriage.

Remember, “There is nothing that you lack” 

All your needs have already been supplied in Christ Jesus 


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